If Only…


If Only…

i could accept the changes of my life

I was a little boy again riding my bike through the woods

there was more time to fix the broken heart

the trauma and stress went away

I could sleep longer

i could meet up again with old friends

i could handle the suffering

i wouldn’t become unglued so easily

I could embrace mental illness with open arms

the explosions were less severe

I was stronger

the summer never ended

the Fall could last forever

Winter never came

the pain would stop growing

life was simpler

Bewildered Existance

This is not intended to be a NEGATIVE poem

Its is merely coming from a place of love……


A natural observer

Sitting on a bench beside

A brick wall

Strangers passing by

Different colors

Different ideas

It’s who we are

Music dances in the head

No one is the same really

But everyone plays the game

Life is very complicated

There’s no easy way to do it

Not everyone wins in the end

Everyone separates themselves

Getting into their own worlds

Of confusion

To try and figure it out

What is the answer to life?

Or is life even asking questions?

Why do we follow routine?

A course laid down

By the generations before us

Is it safe to feel secure

And have we forgotten about our spirits?


Things keep getting complicated

We work hard to make things difficult

Destroying land to build chaos

To educate our children devastation

How often is the world silent

With it’s overcrowded streets?

We took our energy and created machinery

The days keep getting shorter

With all this mass destruction

Seems like there’s no time to breath

Build clean energy all around

People need to know one another

To love the earth

To remove their hate

To increase their positive flow of energy

People should appreciate

What’s around them already

Talk of revolution

In this different era

A rebellion against conformity

A resistance towards regulation

A generation brainwashed

Cannot breath

A rat race towards success

Thought control

The minds we know

It must come to an end

Chaos swims throughout the land

An understanding must be explained

Bursting are the words

The thoughts

Which tell of planned deaths

A dying America is what’s foreseen

A negative force

Unnoticed by most

It’s destroying happiness

Something which apparently

This nation was founded on

So tired of the world observed

Divided by hatred, opinions and jealousy

What is the goal of humanity?

To be some place where one can think

Believe in examining your feelings

Why is success measured in such materialistic ways?

Eventually the path doesn’t feel so right

Eventually you just want time to figure your life out

Growing weary racing towards the sun


Despite The Pain

This is that time of year to express gratitude because Thanksgiving is around the corner. But let me just share this story with you:

One week ago I was in a car accident at work in a company car. And that very same day my wife was going for a jog in the morning and somebody in a vehicle was chasing her, seriously! It was a rather dramatic day. Then only two days later someone broke into our house. The perpetrator took our desktop computer which contained all of our personal information and we lost all of our music or movies documents pictures and all sorts of precious memories. The two of us were very shaken up to find our front door kicked open late at night coming home from going out to dinner and having a really nice day despite what happened a few days earlier.

But I guess things happen in threes so hopefully we’re done dealing with unpleasantries for at least a few more months. However I know that we are fortunate that neither one of us was hurt that nothing else was stolen or broken that a tornado did not destroy our house and the list goes on and on of how many worse things could’ve happened. We were not displaced and did not end up homeless. We spent a couple of sleepless nights together pondering on all the what if’s and doing all kinds of research as to how to protect our home more securely and yet still I know how misfortunate other people can have it compared to what we went through.

Believe me when I say that I am truly grateful and thankful for what we do have that every morning we wake up and have breakfast and go to

imagework. And the money that we get paid from our jobs goes towards food and clothing and shelter.

I do think it’s okay and normal to feel stress from what happened to us last week. It’s understandable that when you’re in an automobile accident and that somebody in your neighborhood is chasing you while going for a casual jog in the morning and then to top it off, have your house burglarized….one would say they’ve had a little bit of a stressful week. This blog of mine is called “Noe’s happy place” blog so I am happy that worse things didn’t happen as a result from all this and that I am appreciative to still be able to type out my feelings like I’m doing now. There are many things to be happy about I just needed to get this off my chest…..

With Love,

Chris Noe

What does Christmas mean….for me?

Being organized doesn’t make your life easier. Being HAPPY makes life awesome! Getting all the presents wrapped, the trees decorated, the bills paid, the food all prepared and pulling your hair out can be mighty stressful. Are we in a hurry or something? Do we really need to brag and complain? That seems to be the two main focal points of the holidays. Bragging = look at me, look what I got, I am special! Complaining = but I want it now, thats not what I asked for, I’m so bored and the ever popular “are we there yet?” Life throws us curve balls, potholes, rainy days, getting sick and the inevitable end of life. Let’s face it, accept it and move on. We all will eventually die. Our lives should focus more on gratitude. Looking around this room that I sit here now and spend this moment to type my words is a good place to start.

I have a computer. I am sitting in a comfortable chair. There are cd’s on my shelf. In this room there’s two cabinets filled with art supplies. A small pull out couch is next to me. A window with vertical blinds that allows me to see beautiful ponds and weeping willow trees. I can SEE. I am not BLIND. I can touch and feel the keyboard as I express my thoughts right now. I smell the coffee and freshly baked cookies downstairs. We have a kitchen and the supplies necessary to make food and beverages. Why should I complain about doing the dishes? Why should I complain that I am running late for work or that I have too many places to go to this weekend or too many obligations? Why? That is just futile! Complain? Let’s go ask a homeless woman that’s starving in downtown Aurora right now at the Hessed House what kinds of things she has to COMPLAIN about! Or how about that old man in a nursing home who has nobody to call or visit. What’s he complaining about? They would love to have dishes, food, a job, a place to go. It simply puts my life in perspective.

Christmas is a time, first and foremost, to celebrate the miracle of a special birth. Birth in general is a miracle. It is a continuation of Thanksgiving, really. There are amazing lights, clothing, decorations, music, movies, etc. There’s nothing wrong with celebrating. I just wish everyone would stop whining about what they DON’T have. YOU HAVE A LOT if you’re even reading this blog post right now! Be grateful that you didn’t wind up in a coma from a car accident caused by text messaging while driving. Or when kids barely even out of diapers are complaining that their life sucks because they don’t have an iPhone? Seriously? What happened to normal families with rules and obedience and joy and thankfulness and HAPPINESS?

Hug your mom and dad, Call your best friend, Make time for gratitude because once its gone……its not coming back

Take a risk, take a trip, force yourself to LAUGH! I will now share one final thought before I go.

everyone actually touches the world in a positive way. do not curse what cannot be seen. simply light a spark within your self and light the world with your own energy and you’ll know what to do and where to go