Posted in Therapy

Despite The Pain

This is that time of year to express gratitude because Thanksgiving is around the corner. But let me just share this story with you:

One week ago I was in a car accident at work in a company car. And that very same day my wife was going for a jog in the morning and somebody in a vehicle was chasing her, seriously! It was a rather dramatic day. Then only two days later someone broke into our house. The perpetrator took our desktop computer which contained all of our personal information and we lost all of our music or movies documents pictures and all sorts of precious memories. The two of us were very shaken up to find our front door kicked open late at night coming home from going out to dinner and having a really nice day despite what happened a few days earlier.

But I guess things happen in threes so hopefully we’re done dealing with unpleasantries for at least a few more months. However I know that we are fortunate that neither one of us was hurt that nothing else was stolen or broken that a tornado did not destroy our house and the list goes on and on of how many worse things could’ve happened. We were not displaced and did not end up homeless. We spent a couple of sleepless nights together pondering on all the what if’s and doing all kinds of research as to how to protect our home more securely and yet still I know how misfortunate other people can have it compared to what we went through.

Believe me when I say that I am truly grateful and thankful for what we do have that every morning we wake up and have breakfast and go to

imagework. And the money that we get paid from our jobs goes towards food and clothing and shelter.

I do think it’s okay and normal to feel stress from what happened to us last week. It’s understandable that when you’re in an automobile accident and that somebody in your neighborhood is chasing you while going for a casual jog in the morning and then to top it off, have your house burglarized….one would say they’ve had a little bit of a stressful week. This blog of mine is called “Noe’s happy place” blog so I am happy that worse things didn’t happen as a result from all this and that I am appreciative to still be able to type out my feelings like I’m doing now. There are many things to be happy about I just needed to get this off my chest…..

With Love,

Chris Noe

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Posted in poetry, Therapy

embrace the mind

No one has to understand me except for me…..yet I don’t accept myself for who I am

like I once did.

I have undergone brain surgery and ever since then my mind has a hard time accepting reality

and I get frustrated when my words don’t come out right

I assume other people don’t understand me

but I will prevail as long as I stay true to myself

and don’t let what other people say bother me

if I could just stop dwelling on the past and blaming other people

for my mistakes

then I can be a more well-adjusted individual.

I once met with a psychotherapist about a year after my surgery

and they told me to imagine this

“you just had a series of librarians that were terminated and a new set of librarians came into your mental library and had to try to make sense out of where you are filing things and you may have once had a well organized system that was going on and now it is a little more scrambled up and you have a young fresh set of librarians trying to make sense of what was once there and furthermore you could have a set of kids that have attention problems trying to do what was once there.”

But I truly know that people care about me

my friends my family my coworkers

so I don’t make false claims that nobody understands me

in the end it really just comes down to a simple thing

Chris Noe needs to accept himself and understand himself

that his life is good

his life does make sense

the things that he is doing is normal

but that I need to understand that my mind may not always be fully engaged

like it used to be

my mind is in a constant state of being distracted

that I can jump from topic to topic

that I might be happy one minute and sad the next

that I may be all jokester dude at work

and then come home and slouch on the couch

and just want to go to sleep and then

the next thing you know I want to spend time with my nieces

or play guitar hero.

I am a unique person

and the fragments might be remaining from a time prior to my brain surgery

and my wedding

that only shortly occurred after that

but when the day is through

I can wake up another day and know that my adventures

will keep on trucking

thank you for listening

now carry on with your life’s

Love Chris
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